A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
