stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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