Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
