i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
