there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize