wat bout pragnant strippers??
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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