god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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