Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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