I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Randomize
