Sacagawea was the original milf.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
