We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
