we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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