You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
