Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
