covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
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