U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
