Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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