I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
