oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
