I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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