yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Randomize