he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
