What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize