My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
