Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
