Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
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