Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize