I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
