CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
