Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize