We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
