he was CRYING into my vagina
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Randomize
