So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
