Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
