I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
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