is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
