I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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