can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize