I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
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