Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
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