He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
