I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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