we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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