help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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