Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize