We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
