I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize