Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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