VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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