Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
