so that wasnt chicken after all
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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